A few years back I had a student, Nainesh who was voracious reader. He was in 11 std & had read Arundhati Roy’s ‘God of small things’ ! It was new then & certainly difficult for a fifteen year old,or so I felt. Normally I am friendly with my students but maintain a distance. He would find time , come & have a chat.
He was at least 4 times of what I am in girth,( I have never been frail or delicate after my fifth std )when we walked people would stare. I asked him when he had started reading & he remembered his English teacher in std 9th had motivated them to read. In a few years it was an excellent achievement.
He decided to participate in a elocution competition which had this subject, Movement & gestures. I asked him to go to his English teacher & get some points. But he wanted me to guide him. I was overwhelmed & touched by his confidence in me. So that was when I thought more about the movements of hand & the gestures. I agreed to help him but put in a condition that I will talk along & he has to pick up the points.
Once he had put a difficult question for me (Even today I admire his courage ! ) ‘Didn’t you have a boyfriend?’ more than the question I was taken aback by his straightforwardness.( Of course I had been asked by my uncle also, ‘Don’t people misunderstand you because you are so friendly ?’ But I can be blunt when needed so I don’t think anybody had the wrong idea.) I looked at him & answered, ‘He would have been my husband today. It was not a trend then to have one as a boyfriend & another a s a husband.’ Being direct helped me to understand him better.
When you explain in class people are watching so my expressions, my hands, my posture has to be right. I cannot touch my face or pat my hair again & again.The students know my style by now, so some ticks that I have are tolerated. These are movements. In Indian society we don’t appreciate touching, so a pat on the back is ok but unnecessary touching is frowned upon. Let me give an example. We used to watch a show, ‘Yeh Jo hai zindagi’ all of us would be there. At the end of a episode Swaroop Sampat & Shafi Inamdar hugged each other, it was so jarring. We are ok with a father hugging his daughter at’ Bidai ‘ but we don’t expect a hug in a family show.( from then to now times have changed so much I marvel as I am writing this !)
Gestures of your hand are important. If your hands are in the pocket when addressing an adult it is impolite. In films, doesn’t the father realise his son was smoking just now, but putting it out was showing respect. Calling with a gesture is ok for a friend & for an adult. Tapping on his shoulder is fine but you have to maintain certain etiquette when approaching a lady. I gave him such & other hints. To my surprise he got the first prize for it. He had been competing against the engineering students. One of whom bagged the second prize.
With every batch the experiences become richer & richer. They make us more mature. So it is not only aging but seasoning with each new student. Nainesh took a drop due to health reasons & naturally lost touch. That one year gave me a wealth of experiences. There was a series, ‘Touch’ touching a life of an autistic child, beautifully executed. We are here waiting for season 2. A touch , from good touch to bad touch it can mean so much more.Touching our lives in so many ways. We, as teachers try our best to touch their lives so they will prosper & move ahead in life.
Moving ahead & trying to touch so much more in future….!
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